I have found that boundaries are one of the most challenging things to maintain in relationships. We are not taught them, and they are often seen as cold, unkind, or distant. I love this talk because it highlights the real benefits of boundaries and how they can improve both your own life, but also your relationships. Boundaries in work, relationships, and with ourselves are crucial and I think Sarri GilmanSarri GilmanSarri Gilman does a great job explaining that.
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How do you practice good boundaries? Where do you find boundaries the most challenging?
This so hits home with a talk I had with my lil sister yesterday. She is a people pleaser so doesn’t like to set boundaries, she would rather make people happy. One of her her male coaches at gymnastics likes to pick her up and throw her in the foam pit ( because she is small and easy to throw). She is always telling me that she doesn’t like it so I finally asked her why she lets him do it then and her answer was “because it makes him happy.” I realize this is not a big deal yet since she is only 8 years old but warning bells went off in my head. She needs to learn to set boundaries now so this dons’t turn into a much bigger problem down the road in other types of relationships. Boundaries are so important. Anyway, long rant, sorry but great post as always.
Oh my gosh! This is such a good example. I agree; we need to start breaking the people pleasing habit early. I think we also think in extremes and assume that boundaries make us cold or too self-focused, but they truly don’t! She’s lucky to have you as a big brother and sounding board.